Effective weight-loss days: 25
Days to wedding: 30
Yes, I know, I missed a day.
Yesterday started at 5:30am and ended when I collapsed into bed at around 9 pm. That was after sitting here finalising on line invitations until 11:45 pm on Thursday night. It was some time this morning that I realised I had forgotten to write anything.
Today started at 4:30 am - Glen left for a ride at 5:30. I didn't bother going back to bed - the dogs and I went to get water. I like the early morning here; all you can hear are the birds. We sit in the car while the water tank fills and listen to a Chakra-clearing meditation by Doreen Virtue. I know it's probably my imagination but it seems to me that the dogs get very mellow when I play the meditation.
When we got home, I ate some breakfast and watered the plants (still no sign of any decent rain) then psyched myself up for another Barre conditioning session... oh boy, that one is still hard! I thought about packing it in about half way through but kept going. The thigh burn is phenomenal but I need that - ex-ballet thighs are not pretty once gravity starts to get hold of them. They start to collect around your knees! Anyway, I think it's working so I'll keep at it and eventually I won't feel like throwing up half way through.
Monday is Labour Day so I'll check the gym calendar to see if they will be open. Otherwise, I'll have to postpone weigh-in until Tuesday. I've been diligent with my eating - bought a HUGE amount of fresh veg and fruit and absolutely no processed food yesterday - and on top of exercising every day, I've been working in the garden most days so I'm hopeful that I've lost a little bit.
Small side note:
This stuff is really innocuous, I know. I'm sorry. You see, I have a lot to say - years worth really - but I've also spent most of my life being afraid of the consequences of speaking my mind. Being afraid that I will say the wrong thing or that what I say will cause ridicule - that people will like me less if they actually know me. So, I'm torn here; between wanting to write and being afraid to say anything meaningful. That's why there was such a large gap between when I started this blog and these posts. But I figure that, if I just start writing (even crap like this), I might be able to push past this bullshit and put my scarred ego aside long enough to make a valid contribution. So, can I ask a favour? Please, don't comment on my posts. Not yet. You see, if you leave a positive comment, I won't believe you - I will think you are just trying to be nice and it will make me aware that someone is out there. If you say something less complimentary - well, as someone once said - 'the bad stuff is easier to believe' and that will be the end of me.
I'm tired. Going to bed.
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