Effective weight-loss days: 25
Days to wedding: 30
Yes, I know, I missed a day.
Yesterday started at 5:30am and ended when I collapsed into bed at around 9 pm. That was after sitting here finalising on line invitations until 11:45 pm on Thursday night. It was some time this morning that I realised I had forgotten to write anything.
Today started at 4:30 am - Glen left for a ride at 5:30. I didn't bother going back to bed - the dogs and I went to get water. I like the early morning here; all you can hear are the birds. We sit in the car while the water tank fills and listen to a Chakra-clearing meditation by Doreen Virtue. I know it's probably my imagination but it seems to me that the dogs get very mellow when I play the meditation.
When we got home, I ate some breakfast and watered the plants (still no sign of any decent rain) then psyched myself up for another Barre conditioning session... oh boy, that one is still hard! I thought about packing it in about half way through but kept going. The thigh burn is phenomenal but I need that - ex-ballet thighs are not pretty once gravity starts to get hold of them. They start to collect around your knees! Anyway, I think it's working so I'll keep at it and eventually I won't feel like throwing up half way through.
Monday is Labour Day so I'll check the gym calendar to see if they will be open. Otherwise, I'll have to postpone weigh-in until Tuesday. I've been diligent with my eating - bought a HUGE amount of fresh veg and fruit and absolutely no processed food yesterday - and on top of exercising every day, I've been working in the garden most days so I'm hopeful that I've lost a little bit.
Small side note:
This stuff is really innocuous, I know. I'm sorry. You see, I have a lot to say - years worth really - but I've also spent most of my life being afraid of the consequences of speaking my mind. Being afraid that I will say the wrong thing or that what I say will cause ridicule - that people will like me less if they actually know me. So, I'm torn here; between wanting to write and being afraid to say anything meaningful. That's why there was such a large gap between when I started this blog and these posts. But I figure that, if I just start writing (even crap like this), I might be able to push past this bullshit and put my scarred ego aside long enough to make a valid contribution. So, can I ask a favour? Please, don't comment on my posts. Not yet. You see, if you leave a positive comment, I won't believe you - I will think you are just trying to be nice and it will make me aware that someone is out there. If you say something less complimentary - well, as someone once said - 'the bad stuff is easier to believe' and that will be the end of me.
I'm tired. Going to bed.
Saturday 4 October 2014
Thursday 2 October 2014
Wedding Countdown... busy, busy, busy!
Effective weight-loss days: 27
Days to wedding: 32
Can't talk now. Busy fighting with my abominable download speed while trying to create and edit after-wedding party invitations. A friend put me on to Paperless Post, so I'm giving that a go.
Tell you all about it tomorrow.
Days to wedding: 32
Can't talk now. Busy fighting with my abominable download speed while trying to create and edit after-wedding party invitations. A friend put me on to Paperless Post, so I'm giving that a go.
Tell you all about it tomorrow.
Wednesday 1 October 2014
Wedding Countdown: temptations abound!
29 Days until we leave for Fiji.
33 Days until the wedding.
Today I was reminded of how much I use food as a crutch to prop myself up when everything goes pear-shaped - or even slightly out of the ordinary!
I won't go into details but suffice to say a rather annoying email from a certain faculty member had me craving something, hell, ANYTHING sweet today! I can, however, proudly state 'I did not succumb!' I followed the same activity and eating plan as yesterday (mainly because I haven't been grocery shopping yet), managed to get through a whole Barre Conditioning DVD class (oh boy, that was a challenge!) AND went to Breathe this evening.
Therein lay the second temptation of the day; the scales. But I have set myself this challenge and that generally steals my resolve enough to overcome these pesky thorns, so I can also say 'I did not give in to the temptation to sneak a peak at the scales'.
What's the big deal about not weighing myself more than once a week? I don't know about blokes but most women know that their weight can fluctuate quite significantly from one day to the next. Weighing in once a week is really a bit of a stretch - given the monthly roller coaster ride our hormones take us on but it's a compromise between accuracy and accountability - since a month is a very long time to go without feedback. If I had weighed myself tonight (a mere 2 days after my initial weigh-in) I could have found one of three things; 1. I am still 59 kg; 2. I am less than 59 kg or; 3. I am more than 59kg. Both the first and last outcomes would do nothing to improve my resolve so the odds are not in favour of premature weigh-ins!
So here I am at the end of a long day, thoroughly exhausted but also just a little proud of myself for making such a sterling effort. Now to transfer some of that resolve to completing invitations and some beading work for my wedding cuff! We've left it way too late for printed invitations so I'm taking my dearest friend's advice and researching electronic options. More on that later.
33 Days until the wedding.
Today I was reminded of how much I use food as a crutch to prop myself up when everything goes pear-shaped - or even slightly out of the ordinary!
I won't go into details but suffice to say a rather annoying email from a certain faculty member had me craving something, hell, ANYTHING sweet today! I can, however, proudly state 'I did not succumb!' I followed the same activity and eating plan as yesterday (mainly because I haven't been grocery shopping yet), managed to get through a whole Barre Conditioning DVD class (oh boy, that was a challenge!) AND went to Breathe this evening.
Therein lay the second temptation of the day; the scales. But I have set myself this challenge and that generally steals my resolve enough to overcome these pesky thorns, so I can also say 'I did not give in to the temptation to sneak a peak at the scales'.
What's the big deal about not weighing myself more than once a week? I don't know about blokes but most women know that their weight can fluctuate quite significantly from one day to the next. Weighing in once a week is really a bit of a stretch - given the monthly roller coaster ride our hormones take us on but it's a compromise between accuracy and accountability - since a month is a very long time to go without feedback. If I had weighed myself tonight (a mere 2 days after my initial weigh-in) I could have found one of three things; 1. I am still 59 kg; 2. I am less than 59 kg or; 3. I am more than 59kg. Both the first and last outcomes would do nothing to improve my resolve so the odds are not in favour of premature weigh-ins!
So here I am at the end of a long day, thoroughly exhausted but also just a little proud of myself for making such a sterling effort. Now to transfer some of that resolve to completing invitations and some beading work for my wedding cuff! We've left it way too late for printed invitations so I'm taking my dearest friend's advice and researching electronic options. More on that later.
Tuesday 30 September 2014
Wedding Countdown
One month until we fly out for Fiji.
Thirty four days until my wedding.
4 kg to lose!
Ok, I will admit that I'm becoming a little self-obsessed as the date of my wedding to my beloved Glen Fox approaches. I think I can proudly state that I have managed to avoid any 'bridezilla' moments - even while dealing with Glen's recalcitrant and somewhat heartless tailor (who asked him to try on a shirt that was at least two sizes too small for him!) - but I finally made it back to the Breathe last night after the month-I'd-rather-forget and weighed myself on their scales.... 59 kg exactly!
Now, that might not seem too bad, except I'm only 157cm tall and would like to sit around 55 - 56kg normally. That is what I weighed when I first tried on my gorgeous wedding dress and cried in front of the mirror in The Babushka Ballerina because I couldn't believe I would be able to wear such a beautiful thing.
I'd like to look like that on November 3rd, 2014 when I walk onto that beach and Glen sees me in that dress. So, indulge me my self-obsession for the next 34 days as I endeavour to shed those extra four kilos and re-tone my abs and thighs so I can proudly wear not only my wedding dress but also my bikini!
I'm not going to beat myself up too much but to analyse how I ended up finding a few extra kilos, let's just say being vegan doesn't preclude me from eating delicious desserts and cakes! September, as I have already alluded, has been a bit of a shit. We started the month with a funeral - and that kind of set the scene. We thought we would end that day on a happy note so told our neighbours about the wedding that night. Mixed emotions followed though as they were happy for us but not so pleased we had kept it a secret since December 26th, 2013! I had a call from my Dad two days later letting me know that my grandmother had passed away the previous evening. That Friday, Glen flew to Vienna for a conference and passed out on the plane, so I spent the week wondering whether he was going to come home to me. I put the ceremony programmes together for both funerals and that, coupled with a bout of the doldrums meant that I ran out of energy and just couldn't bring myself to face the gym or even my favourite Zama Yoga classes.
Add into this mix a commitment I had previously made to host a girl's night while Glen was overseas which involved two days of frenzied cooking of vegan delicacies like Margarita cupcakes, Mexican Hot Chocolate cupcakes, cream cheese, soy yogurt, mock cream, maple syrup-flavoured cashew cream, involtini, maple and ginger toasted almonds, banana bread, molasses and ginger cakes, Caprice salad tarts, freshly baked sour dough bread, 'cheesy' scones and zucchini muffins (I'm sure there was more!). Then, of course, after cooking all this delicious food I had to sample it didn't I? Wash this all down on the night with pink lavender lemonade (bubbles supplied by sparkling wine) and Sangria.... hello 4 kg!
So, as of today, the left-over cake has been moved to the deep-freeze where I won't see it every time I open the fridge and I will be planning a healthy, portion-controlled eating regime to accompany a fairly strict exercise programme.
Progress so far
Today I accomplished the following;
The plan is to weigh myself once a week at the gym and give a daily update of my progress. I know this won't really interest anybody else, but it will help me stay accountable.
Let's see how I go!
Thirty four days until my wedding.
4 kg to lose!
Ok, I will admit that I'm becoming a little self-obsessed as the date of my wedding to my beloved Glen Fox approaches. I think I can proudly state that I have managed to avoid any 'bridezilla' moments - even while dealing with Glen's recalcitrant and somewhat heartless tailor (who asked him to try on a shirt that was at least two sizes too small for him!) - but I finally made it back to the Breathe last night after the month-I'd-rather-forget and weighed myself on their scales.... 59 kg exactly!
Now, that might not seem too bad, except I'm only 157cm tall and would like to sit around 55 - 56kg normally. That is what I weighed when I first tried on my gorgeous wedding dress and cried in front of the mirror in The Babushka Ballerina because I couldn't believe I would be able to wear such a beautiful thing.
I'd like to look like that on November 3rd, 2014 when I walk onto that beach and Glen sees me in that dress. So, indulge me my self-obsession for the next 34 days as I endeavour to shed those extra four kilos and re-tone my abs and thighs so I can proudly wear not only my wedding dress but also my bikini!
I'm not going to beat myself up too much but to analyse how I ended up finding a few extra kilos, let's just say being vegan doesn't preclude me from eating delicious desserts and cakes! September, as I have already alluded, has been a bit of a shit. We started the month with a funeral - and that kind of set the scene. We thought we would end that day on a happy note so told our neighbours about the wedding that night. Mixed emotions followed though as they were happy for us but not so pleased we had kept it a secret since December 26th, 2013! I had a call from my Dad two days later letting me know that my grandmother had passed away the previous evening. That Friday, Glen flew to Vienna for a conference and passed out on the plane, so I spent the week wondering whether he was going to come home to me. I put the ceremony programmes together for both funerals and that, coupled with a bout of the doldrums meant that I ran out of energy and just couldn't bring myself to face the gym or even my favourite Zama Yoga classes.
So, as of today, the left-over cake has been moved to the deep-freeze where I won't see it every time I open the fridge and I will be planning a healthy, portion-controlled eating regime to accompany a fairly strict exercise programme.
Progress so far
Today I accomplished the following;
- collected 2 loads of water from the pump station
- cut back 1 purple tussock grass so it can re-shoot before our family barbecue on 15th November
- collected 1 wheelbarrow full of weeds from the native gardens
- removed 1 wheelbarrow of waste from the vegetable patch
- Zumba abs workout
- 4 loads of washing
- re-designed my blog
- 1/2 cup oats + gluten-free cereal with 4 blueberries picked from our garden and a small amount of fat-free soy milk
- 1 piece of wholegrain toast with a smear of nut spread (Brazil, almond, cashew)
- 1/4 cup mixed dried fruit & nuts
- oven-baked vegan-friendly Vegie Delights not-burger patti with steamed carrot, beans and broccoli
- chocolate protein shake made with 200ml fat-free soy milk, 2 tbsp home made soy yogurt, 1 tbsp Nature's Way Instant Natural Protein (chocolate) powder (no animal products).
- felafel and salad wrap
- 2 fresh medjool dates
The plan is to weigh myself once a week at the gym and give a daily update of my progress. I know this won't really interest anybody else, but it will help me stay accountable.
Let's see how I go!
Tuesday 8 April 2014
I'm supposed to be working today...
Hmmm... after three weeks of intensive scurrying to finalise grant applications, my brain died last week as I caught up on things like finding the floor underneath Pippi's (my pom) expended fluff, buying actual food (instead of takeaway) and then cooking up some lovely vegan meals.
This week, back to work.... come on brain!
I did go to a seminar last Wednesday that had me fired up for a few hours. It was elating and depressing at the same time. QAAFI (the organisation I work for at UQ) hosted a lecture by renowned archaeo-botanist, Professor Dorian Fuller. He talked about his work unravelling the human history of plant use, domestication and agricultural exploitation in India as well as more general theories on these issues on a world-scale. Since I've been trying to convince the director of QAAFI to let me study similar issues with Australian plants for some time now (since before he was director of QAAFI), I found the topic both enlightening and stimulating.
Then that voice kicks in and I start to wonder how I've ended up diverging so far away from my original path.
Oh well, that's what happens when you just let life tell you what to do I suppose.
If you're interested in archaeo-botany at all, here's a link to Prof. Fuller's University College London page:
http://www.ucl.ac.uk/archaeology/people/staff/fuller
More later!
This week, back to work.... come on brain!
I did go to a seminar last Wednesday that had me fired up for a few hours. It was elating and depressing at the same time. QAAFI (the organisation I work for at UQ) hosted a lecture by renowned archaeo-botanist, Professor Dorian Fuller. He talked about his work unravelling the human history of plant use, domestication and agricultural exploitation in India as well as more general theories on these issues on a world-scale. Since I've been trying to convince the director of QAAFI to let me study similar issues with Australian plants for some time now (since before he was director of QAAFI), I found the topic both enlightening and stimulating.
Then that voice kicks in and I start to wonder how I've ended up diverging so far away from my original path.
Oh well, that's what happens when you just let life tell you what to do I suppose.
If you're interested in archaeo-botany at all, here's a link to Prof. Fuller's University College London page:
http://www.ucl.ac.uk/archaeology/people/staff/fuller
More later!
Monday 7 April 2014
Why am I doing this?
OK, this is my first attempt at a blog.
I thought this might be a good way of trying to consolidate some ideas and start communicating them to others, if anybody is interested.
There is, of course, that little, rather annoying voice in the back of my head telling me that 'I don't have time for this, I'll never manage to keep at it' and, oh yes, 'who would be interested in anything I have to say anyway?' ...
Well, be that as it may, I'm a little tired of that voice and I'm a little tired of having stilted conversations with other adults who make me feel like a ten-year-old because I'm too afraid I'm going to say the wrong thing. So, here I am... blogging... hoping this will give me a chance to be and grow and sometimes vent without being overly concerned that I might offend someone.
I won't promise to be diligent, because I'm not.
I will promise to be honest.
And, I promise myself that I will have a voice about subjects I usually avoid in conversation because it's just too hard or because I don't want to start an argument!
More later!
I thought this might be a good way of trying to consolidate some ideas and start communicating them to others, if anybody is interested.
There is, of course, that little, rather annoying voice in the back of my head telling me that 'I don't have time for this, I'll never manage to keep at it' and, oh yes, 'who would be interested in anything I have to say anyway?' ...
Well, be that as it may, I'm a little tired of that voice and I'm a little tired of having stilted conversations with other adults who make me feel like a ten-year-old because I'm too afraid I'm going to say the wrong thing. So, here I am... blogging... hoping this will give me a chance to be and grow and sometimes vent without being overly concerned that I might offend someone.
I won't promise to be diligent, because I'm not.
I will promise to be honest.
And, I promise myself that I will have a voice about subjects I usually avoid in conversation because it's just too hard or because I don't want to start an argument!
More later!
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